God Ordained Authority - Man of the House

Bible Book: Ephesians  5 : 21-29
Subject: Husband; Father; Men; Family; Marriage

Ephesians 5:21-29

God is a God of order. The universe He created was created orderly. His plan for marriage, parenting, government, and the church is for them to run orderly. In each of these divinely ordained institutions, it requires authority and leadership. Without leadership there would be confusion. Satan works where there is chaos. In our society, we are seeing the corruption and collapse of these institutions. Homes are stronger when the husband takes his God given role of leadership seriously.



1. Resemblance to the Creator. (Gen. 1:26-27)

“So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.” (Gen. 1:27) The crown of God’s creation is man who was made in the image of God. This resemblance is not physical because God is Spirit. Male and female are both image bearers of God. Both Adam and Eve were created in God’s image, equal before God. Distinctions in masculine and feminine roles are ordained by God as part of the created order.

2. Responsibility to the Creator.

God delegated dominion of creation to Adam and Eve. Notice verses 26 and 28. “Let them have dominion. (Gen. 1:26; 28) Adam was assigned the responsibility of caretaker over God’s creation. (Gen. 2:15) God spoke directly to Adam concerning the fruit that was not to be eaten. (Gen. 2:16-17)


1. Headship.

Adam was given headship of the home by God. Headship does not mean Lordship. God is a God of order. In any organization or relationship, there must be leadership. Concerning the marriage relationship, Paul stated in 1 Cor. 11:3: “But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.”The marriage relationship between a husband and his wife is a picture of Christ’s relationship with the church. Christ is the head of the church. The church is the bride of Christ.

2. Helpmeet.

The Hebrew word for “helper” means “one who supplies that which is lacking.” Woman completes man. She is more than a maid and a cook. Matthew Henry wrote: “If man is the head, she is the crown, a crown to her husband, the crown of the visible creation. The man was dust refined, but the woman was dust double-refined.” Woman, being created last, is God’s crowning glory of all that He had made.

I believe Adam and Eve lived in perfect harmony and unity before the fall. I do not believe Adam was a bully over Eve. He would have shown love and respect to her. He was not an arrogant and demanding dictator. I do not think Eve was jealous, rebellious, or even considered Adam’s position as head over her as threatening. They both were submissive to the loving and caring God who created them.



1. Deception of Eve.

Satan deceived Eve. She failed in several ways. First, she should have never listened to Satan’s lies.Second, she should have never doubted God’s Word. Third, she should have called for Adam.

2. Deliberate act of Adam.

Adam’s sin was far worse. Eve was deceived. Adam transgressed knowingly and willingly against the will of God. He was responsible for Eve’s protection as the spiritual leader. The Word of God was given to Adam. After God confronted Adam, he tried to place the blame on Eve. (Gen. 3:12) God reminded Adam that he listened to Eve and ate the fruit instead of obeying His Word. (Gen. 3:17)


1. Suffering from sin.

In Genesis 3:17-19, God said to Adam: “cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life; Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field; In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return.” Adam and Eve were not cursed, but the whole world has suffered from the curse.

2. Sentence of death.

 As the appointed head of God’s creation, Adam due to his sin brought death and destruction to the entire human race. “Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for all have sinned.” (Rom. 5:12)


Ever since the entrance of sin into the human race, there have been conflicts between men and women, husbands and wives. God said to Eve, “I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.” (Gen. 3:16) The word “desire” can mean to usurp or control.Since Eve, women have been trying to have control over men. Ever since Adam, the harsh treatment of women by men has been practiced in much of the world, even in America. The love, harmony and unity they knew before was gone. After Adam and Eve’s sin, they died spiritually. They both had a sin nature. Conflicts are the result of men and women having sinful natures.


In the Christian marriage, the man and woman are to submit to Christ. He is their Creator, Lord and Savior. They are to love Christ and serve Him faithfully. In submitting to God, they are to fulfill their ordained roles in the marriage relationship. While imperfect because of sin, the Christian marriage will come closer to fulfilling God’s purpose as He intended it to be before the fall.


Jesus is the model of submission. Although He is equal to the Father, He submitted to the Father’s will. In John 6:38 Jesus said: “I came down from heaven, not to do mine own will but the will of Him that sent me.” The Father’s will was for His Beloved Son to die upon the cross. In the garden Jesus prayed, “thy will be done.”


The word “submission” in the Greek has a military meaning. It is not used as a command to the wife but more like an earnest appeal. The wife’s submission is not something forced or demanded by the husband. She must be submitted to Christ, her ultimate authority. She is to submit to her husband. Her submission is voluntary as she responds to her husband’s love and care. If the husband demands of her to do something that is against the will of God, she is to obey the Lord.


In the Book of First Peter, Peter taught that Christians are to be submissive to their government, servants are to be submissive to their masters, and wives are to submit to their husband. In 1 Peter 3:1, the woman is told to be in subjection to her husband. In 1 Peter 3:7, the man is told to be in subjection to his wife. He is to attend to her needs.


1. Servant role for the Husband.

“The head of every man is Christ.” (1 Cor. 11:2) The husband is to follow Christ’s example in that He loves His church and “gave Himself for it.” (Eph. 5:25) The husband is instructed to nourisheth (provide for his wife’s needs) and cherish (to give her tender love) his wife. The manner of submission for the husband is to love and care for his wife.

“Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it.” Eph. 5:25

“So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church.” Eph. 28-29

“Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.” Eph. 5:33

“Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.” Col. 3:19

“Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.” 1 Peter 3:7

Matthew Henry also wrote: “The woman was not made out of his head to rule over him, nor out of his feet to be trampled upon by him, but out of his side to be equal with him, under his arm to be protected, and near his heart to be beloved.”

2. Submissive role for the wife.

God’s ordained role for the wife is to submit to her husband. She is submitting to the will of God by submitting to her husband.

“Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. “For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the savior of the body. Eph. 5:22-23

Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.” Col. 3:18

“Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives.”

“For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands.” 1 Peter 3:1; 5


1. Wives are told to submit to their own husbands. Adam’s headship in marriage was established by God before the Fall, and was not the result of sin. The wife is not a slave to her husband.

2. Problems arise in the home because of our sinful nature. We are all rebellious. Many marital problems could be resolved if husbands and wives would heed the admonition of Scripture. If both would be humble in spirit and submissive to the Holy Spirit, He would mend many homes. When the husband and wife are submissive to Christ, they will have no disagreement between themselves over who is in charge in their home. Their children will learn to respect authority because of their example.

3.Problems arise in a marriage if the man is passive and the woman is overbearing or if the man is arrogant and domineering and the woman is overly timid.

4. The unmarried must submit to Christ and live a life of humility. Before a woman marries, she should settle the fact that she will be a submissive wife to her husband. Before a man marries, he should have settled the fact that he will be submissive to Christ so he can be a godly husband. If the two marry each other, they will likely have a good marriage.

5. Each of us must be willing to allow the Holy Spirit to change us.Zig Ziglar said: "It is far more important to be the right kind of person than it is to marry the right kind of person. If you treat the wrong person like the right person, you could well end up having married the right person after all.”

6. Salvation is the greatest gift a person can receive. You can only have the gift of salvation by receiving Jesus as your Lord and Savior. Will you receive Him today?